"COMMITMENT" ...
...that word has been popping up left and right for me lately, and when that happens I ALWAYS think, "OK, God. You got my attention....sledgehammer, please...what is it that you're trying to drill into my head, now?"
So I'm kinda nervous. Today I did something that I haven't done in a very long time....I actually made a >>COMMITMENT<< to do something for 10 weeks STRAIGHT! BIG, FAT, HUGE, HAIRY step for me....BIG! The worst part about this is that it's invloving other people. Not just "other" people, but CHILDREN....OTHER PEOPLE'S CHILDREN.....WHO ARE GRIEVING!
You guessed it - I made the committment to start my training to become a small group facilitator for grief counseling at Supporting KIDDS in Hockessin, DE. This invloves 4 Wednesday nights of training, and then the fun begins with the actual 6-weeks of Wednesday nights' counseling.
Now, it's at this particular point that I start to hyperventilate and wonder...."WHY AM I DOING THIS?!?!?! I won't be good at this! What if I do more damage to some little innocent kid?!?! ...what if I suck at this?!?!? ...WHAT IF I'm NOT perfect?!?!?"
When I sit back and I become my own guidance counselor (which I tend to do at least 10 times daily these days), I realize that these thoughts are perfectly natural, and honestly, the fact that I'm even thinking them is a good sign that I CARE....which will in turn probably make me a good counselor....so there! I talked myself down off of that little ledge. WHEW! ...WOW!
...I AM GOOD!
I'll keep you all posted on how well I do here....(stay tuned! "Same BAT TIME, Same BAT CHANNEL!") Ka-POW!
